What Lengths Would You Go To?
by RMNicki
Summary: When Rose and Lissa return to the Academy, Rose shows signs of PTSD and trauma, but she is beyond amazing at hiding it...Except maybe, from Dimitri. But, when things take a turn for the worst and Dr. Olendszki finds severe injuries on Rose's body...Is her story going to have time to unravel? Or is Rose going to disappear before it does? (Set in Vampire Academy Book #1)
1. Chapter 1

**~*~*~  
Disclamer: I do not own Vampire Academy or any of it's characters, but this is my writing and my work, and should not be used without my permission. Thank you!  
-RMNicki-  
~*~*~**  
Chapter One:  
_I screamed as a pain, worse than any pain I had ever felt before tore it's way through my body. I heard voices and words of encouragement on the outside of what felt like my own dreamy, agony filled realm. I obeyed the orders given to me, only barely staying conscious in the act. I felt a surprisingly tight, familiar hold on my right hand.  
Lissa.  
My breathing was coming fast, my throat hurt, and I felt exhausted. But I couldn't stop. I just couldn't. I wouldn't.  
"The baby's in distress." I managed to hear.  
_What?!_  
No!  
I felt an oxygen mask pressed over my mouth and nose, and I tried to pull it away.  
"Rose, don't! You need it, you need to relax." I heard Lissa. I met her eyes, and she nodded. Tears filled my eyes and spilled over, what if he wasn't alright? What if my little Andrew wasn't alright?  
"I can see the head! Push, Rose, you're almost there!"  
I let out a pain-filled cry, but refused to give up. I would work till the death of me to save the little bundle of joy that had been living inside of me for the past 8 months, 3 weeks and 2 days.  
It was then, that the most amazing sound in the world filled my ears…  
My baby's crying.  
I knew now, that everything was going to be alright. I closed my eyes, and let out a small sob, and Lissa's grip on my hand squeezed gently. I opened my eyes, just barely and saw through blurry vision, dark figures walking into the room...I knew it was all a dream, but my heart shattered into a million pieces as the figures took my baby…And no matter how much I cried and begged…they walked out. My baby in hand. Separating us.  
OoOo_

I screamed and sat straight up in bed. Tears were running down my cheeks, and my body was clammy with sweat. I lay back and curled into the familiar fetal position and let the sobs take me until I'd cried myself out and no more tears came.

I lay there for what felt like hours, staring at my alarm clock, each minute seeming like an eternity. Not long after lying on my back, I began to cough. A wet cough that left my chest and throat hurting, and I sighed, knowing that I was getting sick again. Not sleeping well, left me more susceptible to disease…like right now.

After a while of being miserable, at about 7pm moroi time, I simply decided that I couldn't take another minute of just lying there. I stood, and got ready; putting my workout clothes on, and pulling my hair into a ponytail. I looked in the mirror, before applying the eye drops that I knew would do pretty close to nothing to hide the redness, and tell tale crescents under my eyes. But, it was routine, and I followed it every morning. Some people would consider me O.C.D. But me? I just considered it natural, a way to distract from the nagging depression. I knew I was an hour and half early to the training session with Dimitri. But, running always seemed to work when it came to clearing my thoughts. I walked out the door and towards the track, avoiding the guardians that were on patrol, having memorized their schedules.  
I had nothing better to do.  
I knew I had lost weight, but I didn't care. Not right now. I had something else on my mind.  
A little baby with bright blue eyes, and my dark hair.  
Andrew.  
_My_ little Andrew.  
I would never forget the few short months I had had with my precious baby boy. It had only been three months that I'd been able to spend with him. About a week before Lissa and I had been found, I'd left Andrew in the hands of a family that I trusted, whole-heartedly. I'd told them that Lissa and I were going on vacation for a week…because I knew the guardians were getting closer, and I couldn't risk him getting caught in the cross fire. I knew now though that there was a very good chance that Andrew had been put in the system.

Emotional pain seared my heart, at the thought, and I forced the offending memories out of my mind, right as my feet hit the familiar ground of the track, and I began to run. And run _hard._  
~*~*~

**Dimitri.**

I couldn't get Rose's solemnness the other day out of my mind. Her obvious pain. I had been careful with her during training, afraid that it was physical. I flashed back to the session as I had repeatedly over the past couple days, hoping to find something, _anything_ that would resemble a clue as to why she was breaking down right in front of me.

OoOo

_ I walked into the gym, only to see Rose already there. She was practicing on one of the punching bags.  
At first, I just leaned against the wall and watched. She wasn't bad. In fact she was _good_ at what she was doing. I simply studied her for a few minutes, as I had a couple times since her return to the academy and knew that when she practiced with me, she was holding back. She hadn't necessarily lied to us when she hadn't mentioned that she'd been training while she was away. But she'd worked hard to hide it. Her fighting with the bag, became rigorous, and finally she dropped to her knees and began to cry. It hurt me to see her in so much pain, so I pretended to make an appearance in that moment, and moved quickly to her side.  
"Roza?" I asked, and she jumped and scooted away from me. I kneeled down in front of her, and her eyes read recognition after a few moments of fear, and she wiped her face of any emotion and began to stand. I reached out and caught her arm, pinning her where she was. _

"_What's wrong?"  
She seemed to search my face, and uncertainty crossed hers,  
"What are you hiding? What happened to you out there? You can tell me." I said softly.  
She shook her head, turning her face away from me,  
"No. I can't." She replied, and shook my hand off, standing, only to walk past me.  
For some reason, her expression stuck with me, and I hadn't failed to notice the circles under her eyes, and the redness that told me she wasn't sleeping again. _

_ I gave up on the subject, for now, knowing that I wasn't going to be getting anything else out of her, and began the session._

_OoOo _

I crawled out of bed, having always been an early riser and got ready, wandering outside. I met other guardians and exchanged simple pleasantries, and decided to walk towards the track. I wasn't quite sure what it was, but a part of me told me to walk there. And, as a guardian, I followed instinct.

Once there, I spotted a running figure, and saw that it was Rose running on the track, pushing herself to extremes once again.  
I knew that it was her presence that had drawn me there. I couldn't put a name to the feelings I had about her. But, it wasn't like the other novices. She was special, and I knew for some unexplainable reason that something had happened to her while she was on the run with Vasilisa, but I couldn't put my finger on what. But whatever it was, she was a magnificent actor when it came to hiding it.

I stayed hidden and watched her as she forced herself to keep running. She was working hard, and I could see how exhausted her body was. I searched the edge of the entrance of the track and saw that she had no water. I frowned knowing how unhealthy it was for her to be pushing herself so hard and have nothing to hydrate herself with. I began to walk down to the track and stop her to rest, when about 40 feet from the entrance, she stopped…and collapsed.

"дерьмо!" (Shit.) I cursed in Russian and ran towards her.  
I fell to my knees, beside her. Her eyes were closed, and I put my hand to her throat. Her pulse was irregular, her breathing uneven.  
I put my hand on her arm and shook her slightly,  
"Roza. Roza, come on wake up!"  
She moaned in her reverie, and I could have sworn I heard the name,  
_Andrew.  
_I wasn't able to ponder it long as a sharp breath pierced the silence and her eyes opened slowly.  
Her vision was unfocused and confused at first, then she turned to the side, and coughed, a croupy cough, and when she looked back towards me, there was blood on her lips.  
"Son of a bitch." I growled and slipped my arms beneath her.  
"No!" She murmured in protest, squirming in my arms, the effort causing her to cough once more, and more blood surfaced in her mouth.  
"Turn your head to the side." I ordered, leaving no room for arguments.  
Once she'd ridded what she could of the blood in her mouth she went back to struggling weakly.  
"Rosemarie Nicole Hathaway, _stop._ Or I swear to God, I'll have you sedated when we get to the clinic."  
She stilled and instead, relaxed in my arms, her face in my chest, and I felt her body shaking, until she coughed again.

Guardian Alto caught sight of us and ran to my side. "What's happened?"  
"Run to the clinic, make sure Dr. Olendzski is ready." I said, as he caught sight of the blood seeping out of Rose's lips, the dark circles under her eyes., and the clear paleness of her skin. She choked once more, and he nodded, and took off in the direction of the clinic. I walked quickly, but carefully towards the building, not wanting to shake Roza too much; in fear of causing more blood to soak into her lungs.  
~*~*~

**Rose.**

I felt movement beneath me, and my consciousness slipped in and out of focus as I felt myself being carried. I easily recognized the familiar after shave that let me know that it was Dimitri's arms around me. Normally, it would have been welcome, but this time I wanted free. I couldn't do this. But, all my strength was gone, and darkness lined the edges of my vision.  
I tasted copper in my mouth, and knew that it was blood, but I didn't care. That wasn't what was on my mind.  
What was on my mind was how I was going to get myself out of this predicament in time to follow through on my plan. Bright lights surrounded my vision, and I squeezed my eyes shut as I was lay on a padded surface.  
"How long has she been unresponsive?" I heard.  
_Unresponsive? I'm not unresponsive._ I thought, and tried to open my eyes…but I couldn't. I tried harder, but all it did was cut off my breathing supply, and I began to choke once more. I was turned on my side, as I coughed up more of what I figured was blood.  
I panicked as I struggled to open my eyes, and control my body, but nothing I tried to do fucking worked!  
"Rose. Relax, you're okay in our hands. I'm going to help you." I heard Dr. Olendzski.  
"Can she hear you?" I heard Dimitri.  
"Yes, but not for long. I'm going to take her pain away."

_What?_  
I felt a sting in my arm, and suddenly things began to turn even darker, and the last thing I felt was my lips part against my will, and a foreign object inserted into my mouth.  
Then I was gone.

**Dimitri.**_**  
**_ I sat in the waiting room, waiting on word of how Rose was doing. Guardian Petrov walked in a few minutes later, and I stood.  
She nodded to me, "What happened to her?"  
"I found her on the track at about 7:35."  
Alberta's eyes widened in shock, and I continued,  
"She was working herself harder than she should have been. She didn't have water or anything to hydrate with, and when I went down to stop her, before I could reach her; she collapsed. Her pulse was irregular, and when I began carrying her here, she started to choke, and the next thing I knew she was coughing up blood. I haven't heard anything about her condition since I brought her in."  
Alberta ran her hand over her face and sighed,  
"I have to go teach a class but, if you hear anything…please, let me know."  
I nodded, and she walked out.  
I sat back down, my face in my hands. Should I have stopped Roza sooner?  
I didn't have time to work it out, because in that moment, I heard the doctor's soft voice say my name.  
"Guardian Belikov…?" She asked, I stood, and walked to her and she gave me a small smile.  
"How is she?" I asked.  
She sighed, "She worked her body into absolute exhaustion, she hasn't been sleeping, which made her more susceptible to disease. She has bronchitis, which can be treated. But, I did a full physical, and…" The doctor seemed confused and nervous.  
"What is it?" I asked, worriedly.  
"She had a deep cut on her hip that looked like it had been reopened more than once. But, that wasn't what worried me the most…Her body shows the after effects of parturition."  
"Parturition…" I repeated shocked.  
Dr. Olendzski nodded,  
"Sometime while she was on the run with Vasilisa, she was pregnant and had a baby."  
I tried to get ahold of the information,  
_Roza had had a __**baby.**_  
I nodded, urging the doctor to continue, knowing that she was hiding something.  
She sighed once more, "While doing the examination, I discovered that she might have Vaginismus."  
I was confused at first and she continued to explain the meaning,

"Vaginismus is painful spasmodic contractions of the vagina in response to physical  
contact or pressure. Especially during sexual intercourse. I think Rosemarie _did_ indeed have a baby. But… I don't think her conception was willing."  
My head snapped up at that proclamation,  
"You think she was-"  
"Raped." Dr. Olendzski finished for me, "Severely."  
~*~*~

**Please, let me know what you think! I'm hoping to really make this story into  
something, and I hope you're enjoying it so far! Let me know!  
-RMNicki-**


	2. Choices

_**~*~*~  
Review of last chapter:  
**__She sighed once more, "While doing the examination, I discovered that she might have Vaginismus."  
I was confused at first and she continued to explain the meaning,_

"_Vaginismus is painful spasmodic contractions of the vagina in response to physical  
contact or pressure. Especially during sexual intercourse. I think Rosemarie did indeed  
have a baby. But… I don't think her conception was willing."  
My head snapped up at that proclamation,  
"You think she was-"  
"Raped." Dr. Olendzski finished for me, "Severely."  
~*~*~_

**Rose **

I fought the fogginess that was my mind. I didn't have much control over my actions, at the moment. So, at first, I worked at moving my hands and gripping and letting go of the fabric around me.  
I heard a voice, as if threw murky water saying my name… I took hold of that and worked to let it pull me out of the darkness. When I opened my eyes, the room was bright and I closed my eyes immediately, on instinct as a sharp ray made it's way through my already pounding thoughts.  
Automatically, the lights were clicked off. When I opened my eyes once more, I wasn't alone.  
"D-dimitri?" I croaked.  
He nodded, "How are you feeling?" He asked, a tone of sympathy to his voice.  
"I'm fine…" I whispered, working to sit up. He put a hand on my shoulder and forced me –gently- back down.  
I moaned in protest,  
"You need to stay lying down. The doctor says as little movement as possible. She just recently was able to drain the fluid from your lungs."  
I put my fingers to my lips, "That actually happened?"  
He gave me a small smile, "Yes."  
"When can I leave?" I asked, hopefully.  
He sighed, "First, you have some explaining to do, Roza."  
I flinched, uh oh.  
"What do you mean?"  
"I'm talking about how Dr. Olendzski found evidence of rape on you when she was doing a physical."  
_No, no, no!  
_"She was wrong…" I lied, "I've never been….raped."  
Dimitri sighed, seemingly pained, then leaned against the wall next to my bed,  
"Really? Because, I'd be perfectly fine with going to get her and having her take a second look."  
I practically felt myself pale,  
"I wouldn't let her." I replied, adamantly, my voice weaker than I'd originally wanted.  
"If I had to, I would come in and hold you down."  
I felt involuntary tears fill my eyes,  
"That can't be legal."  
He looked at me with sympathy, "No…I'm sure it's not. But, if you were to go to Alberta or the Headmistress about it, you would most likely have to explain my actions."  
"Why are you doing this?" I whimpered, Tears spilled over, and he sighed, once more, and knelt down in a chair beside me, and took my shaking hand in his.  
"I want to help you Roza. Please…_ Please _tell me what happened to you."  
I looked up and met his chocolate brown eyes and he ran his fingers over my cheek, wiping a tear away. I was shocked at first as that unfamiliar feeling of warmth passed through me. He pulled away, and gave me a small nod of encouragement.  
"You have to promise me…you won't tell anyone." I rasped.  
His face looked pained for a moment, "Roza…"  
"_Please._"  
He took a deep breath and after a few moments, "Alright."  
I closed my eyes, and curled in a ball on my side to protect myself from the inevitable truth,  
"About 1 year after I'd been on the run with Lissa, and we'd gotten comfortable…One night, I'd opted to go and get groceries for us, and when I was coming back…there-there-"  
I choked again, and it was a mixture between a cough and a sob,  
"Sshhh, easy." He coaxed, putting his hand on my arm, until I'd calmed once more,  
"I walked past an alleyway, when I heard a voice…I kept walking, like I knew, was smart. But, a man reached out and grabbed me by my arm. I was training while I was gone, a lot…" I looked up at Dimitri, nervously, and he nodded,  
"I know. Keep going."  
I was surprised that he'd found out, but I did as he said and continued, my voice fading slightly as if I were telling him a secret.  
"I was able to fight him off, and it wasn't too hard. But…he had _friends._" The words dripped off my tongue like acid, "And, I was beginning to take them on, when a gun was pressed to my head…I swear…that's cheating." Dimitri gave me a small smile,  
"He made me get on my knees…" Another sob, "And, the leader made me lick his shoes."  
Dimitri's hands were in fists.  
"Then, afterwards, another kicked me in the side, and then one pressed a cloth over my mouth and nose, and dazed me. They beat me…then had their way."  
I began to cry in earnest, "I felt it all. I was in and out, but even when I was out, it wasn't an escape. I remember every stab of pain as they forced their ways into me, dry. I remember trying to scream, and crying and begging them to stop. But nothing,_ worked!_" I'd worked myself into a frenzy.  
"Stop, stop, stop." Dimtiri said gently, when I looked up, I realized that he was now, standing over me, holding my face in his hands. "You don't need to tell me anymore, Roza."  
I was relieved he'd stopped me, but sad because I knew that he didn't want to hear anymore, because he was disgusted by me and by what had happened to me. I pulled away, and he looked at me apprehensively, as if he knew what I was thinking, but before he could say anything, the door burst open.  
"Where is she?!" I heard Lissa's frantic voice, then she ran to my side, and grabbed me in her thin arms.  
"Ow, Liss." I murmured, still being sore as the sedative wore off. Not to mention the toll the exhaustion had had on my body.  
Speaking of the sedative,  
"How long was I out?" I whispered,  
"3 days." Dimitri replied watching me carefully, and my eyes widened, _3 days!?_  
"3 very _long_ days." Lissa cut in, "I'm going to kill you."  
"Why!? Why was I out so long!"  
"You were exhausted Rose, you needed to relax." Dimitri said, and I began to argue, suddenly angered that they had controlled me so easily. His face darkened slightly, sensing my reaction,  
"Don't." He warned gently, "You don't need to work yourself up while you're still recovering. We can easily have you sedated again."  
"I second that." Lissa replied, backing him up.  
I gave up for now, exasperated, although I seriously disliked how they could control my choices and decisions so easily.  
"Can I sit up, at least?"  
"That would be alright." I heard a third voice, and looked to the door to see the doctor. "You two, however. Out." She ordered, "I need to take her vitals."  
Lissa pouted, and Dimitri smiled fondly at the doctor before they walked out the door.

~*~*~  
**Dimitri**

I walked out of Rose's hospital room with the princess, my mood darkening immediately, not having to hide my distraught sadness from Rose anymore. Lissa looked seeming to study me for a moment, before she sighed,  
"She told you, didn't she?"  
I nodded my head slightly, and Vasilisa looked to the ground,  
"How did you get her too…." She trailed off.  
"The doctor did a full exam on her when I first brought her in, including a genital exam. There was evidence of unwilling intrusion, and…" I looked to the princess, and she was still staring at the ground, obviously hiding something,  
"Look at me." I ordered softly, she swallowed, but did as she was told hesitantly, meeting my eyes.  
"Andrew." I said, and Lissa paled, "Was that the name of Rose's baby?"  
"Rose didn't-" She began, a little too quickly,  
"Princess, don't lie to me. Her body also showed the signs of carrying and birthing a child."  
Vasilisa sagged in front of me, and I caught her, helping her to a nearby chair. She put her face in her hands,  
"Yes." She said, almost to quietly to hear.  
"Yes, what?" I asked in confusion.  
"His name was Andrew."  
I stilled, my stomach dropping as the reality of the situation struck.  
Lissa looked up, "You can't tell anyone, Guardian Belikov." She begged, "_Please._ It would kill Rose…to-to have people know about what happened to her."  
I studied her for about a minute and she never broke my gaze, and I finally relented,  
"She made me promise I wouldn't tell."  
Lissa nodded, "It's important to her."  
The doctor walked out then, and nodded to us, "You're welcome to go back in." She said. I stopped her for a moment as Lissa headed back inside,  
"How long will she need to be here?"  
The doctor grinned, "She asked me the same thing. My guess is that she'll not need to be here any longer than another day, but I strongly suggest she doesn't return to training for at least a week."  
I nodded, and she added on,  
"I'll be prescribing sleeping medication. She made a profuse argument to the decision. An argument stubborn enough that it has me a bit worried. So, I'll be having one of the nurse's come to her each night to administer it by injection."  
"She'll fight that." I said. She nodded, seemingly at a loss for words, and I came up with an idea,  
"I know some medical training, maybe if it's someone she trusts, she'll be a little more lenient."  
Dr. Olendzski studied me for a moment, but nodded, "I have no better ideas."  
"Alright." I said, she nodded once more, "I'll give you the stuff when you leave, she'll need to take it every night at about 9 am moroi time until further notice." I nodded, and a look crossed the doctor's face,  
"What is it?" I asked, she sighed.  
"When you give her the medication at night, I'll need you to take a look at something else…She…She has a deep, horizontal cut on her ribs."  
"From what?" I asked, confused.  
"I can't be sure, but it looks…self inflicted. It's been reopened repeatedly. Would you mind talking to her the night I let her out?"  
"I will." I replied, and walked back into the hospital room.  
She nodded and walked off in the other direction, but turned half way down the hallway,  
"By the way, I haven't told her about the injections yet, you might want to mention it. I wish you luck, Guardian Belikov."  
She winked and I sighed, _great. _

It was 2 and a - half days later that Roza was released, much to her pleasure. I'd broken the news to her a couple hours after Dr. Olendzski had released her about my coming to her dorm room at night-time to give her the shots. She'd made it clear, that she wouldn't go down without a fight, my response to that being,  
"I wouldn't Rose. There's more than one place for me to give you the shot."  
She stopped in her tracks, and turned to face me,  
"You can't mean…"  
"If it comes down to it." I replied unrelentingly.  
"That's really unfair."  
"If it's for your well-being, I'm all for it."  
"Me too." Lissa chimed in, and Rose turned to her,  
"Lissa!"  
"What can I say?" She asked, incredulously, "Even _you_ need sleep, Rose."  
Rose's nose scrunched up in disdain, "Not if I can help it."  
~*~*~

**Rose**

I got my clothes back a couple days later and was perfectly happy to have my _own_ clothes on again.  
I walked with Dimitri to my dorm, after dropping off Lissa. Classes were over by now and I'd been released just in time for curfew on a Friday night. I _also_ knew that I had a shot coming.  
"Are you hungry?" He asked, shaking me out of my reverie, I looked to him, but only for a second,  
"No." I said quietly.  
He sighed, "You're losing weight Rose."  
I didn't reply. I needed to be able to survive on little food to play out the plan I had structured out to happen within the next day or so.

We stopped at my dorm, and he reached out with what I figured was a universal key and opened the lock.  
"That can't be safe." I said, walking in.  
I could practically feel him smile, "What do you mean?"  
"I _mean_ that you guys can like…sneak into our rooms whenever you want." I said, hearing him chuckle.  
"Yes. Because that's what we all have in mind. It's not your safety at all." He said.  
"Mhm." I murmured, making my way around the room. He sat on my bed and watched me carefully as I tidied things up, "I'll be right back." I said, grabbing a pair of my p.j.'s, and moving towards the bathroom.  
"You're procrastinating." He announced.  
I didn't answer and walked into the washroom. I could practically feel his exasperation as I turned the shower on, completely planning on drawing this out.  
After about 20 minutes of showering _thoroughly,_ hoping to wait him out, I got out and put on black shorts and a white tank top. I ran a comb through my hair and put the leave in conditioner in, before slathering my body in lotion.  
I opened the door after a few more minutes and peaked out and groaned when I saw him. I should have known I wouldn't be able to wait him out.

He gave me a small knowing smile, but said in a serious voice,  
"Come here."  
I scrunched my nose at him and he stood right as I went to close the bathroom door again to avoid him.  
He caught it before it had a chance to meet the frame, and before I could get a grip on it with my moisturized hands, he forced it back open, careful of where I stood and grabbed my arm, pulling me out.  
"No, no, no!" I gasped as he pulled me out, "This is harassment!"  
"Settle down." He warned, and when I refused, he grabbed me and tossed me over his shoulder much to my disdain.  
He shook his head, "You, Rose Hathaway are exhausting." He said.  
"So I've been told." I replied, with another startling speed, I found him planted on the bed, me perched firmly on his lap, his arms around me, restraining me from making any movement.  
I was absolutely aware of the intimacy of my position, but I was more interested in avoiding the injection I knew he was intending on giving me.  
_It's not like he's ever wanted you any ways…you're damaged goods.  
_I flinched inwardly,  
"Now. Roza, "  
I swallowed nervously.  
"_You_ get to choose how this goes." He said thoughtfully, "You either get it in your arm…_or_ you fight me, I pin you down and you get it in your bottom. Make a choice."

**Oh hell! So…what does she choose!? Stay updated, guys (; I'm really enjoying writing this story, and I thank you for reading it!  
~*~*~**


	3. She's Gone

**I do not own the Vampire Academy Series or any of it's characters, but this is my writing and should not be used without my permission.  
Thank you for reading, hope you enjoy!  
(:**

Review of Last Chapter:  
With another startling speed, I found him planted on the bed, me perched firmly on his lap, his arms around me, restraining me from making any movement.  
I was absolutely aware of the intimacy of my position, but I was more interested in avoiding the injection I knew he was intending on giving me.  
_It's not like he's ever wanted you any ways…you're damaged goods.  
_I flinched inwardly,  
"Now. Roza, I swallowed nervously.  
"_You_ get to choose how this goes." He said thoughtfully, "You either get it in your arm…_or_ you fight me, I pin you down and you get it in your bottom. Make a choice."  
~*~*~

**Dimitri**  
Rose stilled for a moment at my threat, seeming to sort through her choices.  
"You wouldn't dare!" She challenged.  
I leaned forward so that my lips were at her ear once more,  
"I would."

I cleared my mind of my thoughts, Roza's position on my lap wasn't easy to handle.  
_She comes first. _  
I reminded myself,  
"Make your choice, before _I _do." I warned.  
She took a deep breath, like she was going to surrender, then thrashed out of my arms and ran towards the door.  
I growled deep in my throat and jumped up, her fingers touched the door knob just as I caught her around her waist.  
"No, wait! Dimitri! Don't!" She protested, as I picked her up off the ground.  
"LET ME GO!" She screamed. I tossed her onto the bed, and she turned to face me, as I knelt in front of her, close enough to kiss her.  
_Don't think like that._  
I chastised myself, she'd frozen where she was, my closeness taking the effect on her, I'd hoped it would.  
_I really shouldn't be able to do this. _I thought to myself, because I felt it too…that electric shock when we were together.  
_Focus._  
I grabbed her around her waist, and flipped her onto her stomach, before she could react. I yanked her shorts down just enough to expose the spot where the shot would need to be.  
"_No!" _She cried, "Dimitri, you can't do this!"  
I ignored her cries, as I pressed the needle through her soft skin.  
"Ow!" She gasped, "Ah, that actually hurts!" She threw her hand behind her but I managed to catch it and pin it to the small of her back.  
I didn't reply, and pulled the now empty syringe out and pulled her shorts back up.  
I saw her blushing face, right as she pressed her face into the blanket as she reached back and rubbed her bottom.  
"Oow…"  
"Sorry, Roza." I said gently,  
"That's so embarrassing." She whispered, "I can't believe you actually did that."  
I chuckled,  
"You didn't think I would?"  
"No!"  
"Maybe you won't fight me tomorrow night. "  
"That's unlikely." She whispered as she got on her bed and turned on her side facing me.  
_I need to bring up the cut._ I thought to myself, but saw her eyelids droop.  
I sighed, "Goodnight Roza." But, I was met by her soft breathing. I smiled and picked up one of her blankets that she wasn't laying on and covered her with it. She moved beneath it and curled into a ball. I sighed, knowing that her position was most likely instinct to try to protect herself from her night terrors. I hoped the medication would help with that, though.  
I walked out the door, and nearly ran into Alberta. She gave me a small smile, and told me that she knew about the task I had been given from the doctor. I nodded,  
"How is she doing?" Alberta asked.  
"She's alright. It's exhaustion, she hasn't been sleeping. She was out in minutes."  
"Why?" Alberta asked.  
I sighed, I knew Rose would be upset. I wouldn't tell Alberta about Andrew or the wound on her ribs, but she _did_ need to know about the rape.  
"The doctor found evidence of vaginismus when she was giving her a physical. She says that it's likely that Rose was gang raped while they were out there. Severely."  
Alberta's face drained of color for a few moments,  
"Oh god…" She whispered, looking towards Rose's door.  
"Severely?" She asked, blankly, and I nodded. She closed her eyes and nodded, slowly gaining back her composure.  
"I'm going to set up an appointment with a therapist." Alberta said and I nodded, I knew Rose wouldn't like it. But, she definitely needed it.

**Rose**

I took a deep breath, and forced my eyes to open in the morning. Was it possible that my dreamless sleep scared me more than the nightmares? I couldn't understand my anxiety when I woke. It's like it appeared with a vengeance angry with me for blocking it off over night. Tears filled my eyes, and I looked towards the rug on the floor. Suddenly, I felt sick and ran to the bathroom, throwing up what little contents was in my stomach.

I leaned back against the tub, knowing that I couldn't put this off any longer. The guardians were moving in, especially Dimitri, and I knew that soon, I would lose my opening…for a long time.  
I stood and walked to my door, locking it.  
It was almost time.  
I went to my dresser and pulled the knife out, looking to the closed off window.  
Tears rolled down my cheeks, but I ignored them and knelt by the rug.  
I pulled it away, revealing the big blood soaked spot. It was almost done. I pulled my shirt up, revealing my midsection, and the deep cut that had been opened repeatedly over the months.  
I closed my eyes and took the deep breath I always did, and dug the knife into the wound, and held back a small scream of pain as I cut it open once more, blood running over my hands.

I knelt over the puddle and let the blood flow at the edge to finish off the spot as I panted trying to force back the flood of endorphins that flooded my brain.  
After it had bled enough that I was dizzy, I stood and stumbled slightly. I pressed my hand to the still bleeding wound and wiped it on the wall, and then across my nightstand. After a few more times, I backed up and looked at my work. My room looked like a horror scene. Like someone had…died.  
Good.  
I walked to the bathroom to cover the cut with a towel.  
I looked in the mirror after bandaging it to see that I was pale, I closed my eyes for a second, feeling tired and knew I needed to stop the bleeding.  
This part I really wasn't looking forward to. I pulled out the small kit that was above the toilet before sitting on the toilet lid. I peeled my shirt off, and looked at the time on my watch. I still had two and a half hours before classes started.  
I pulled out a small hand towel and doused it in the surgical alcohol.  
_Oh god, oh god, oh god. _  
I pressed it to the wound before I could think about it, and choked back my cry of agony.  
I held it for 30 seconds until the pain faded then pulled it away, and cleaned the wound once more, so that it was clean of blood.  
Next.  
I rummaged through the kit again before pulling the next instruments of torture out.  
I looped the thread through the head of the needle and knotted it.  
_Deep breath. _I thought miserably, then forced my fingers to still.

~*~*~  
I rolled my eyes as I forced back the feeling that I was being a drug addict as I snorted the 3 tylenol that I'd crushed. I wasn't doing it for a thrill of course, but snorting things caused the effect to happen faster.

I went to my dresser next, pulling out grey jeans, a black v-neck, and black converse. I pulled my hair into a ponytail so that I was more durable. I looked around the room once more, to make sure everything was in place. I grabbed my phone and shattered it on the floor. It was done, everything was perfect….I felt a pang of regret but forced that and all my other emotions back.

_Here goes nothing.  
_~*~*~

**Lissa **

I sighed as I pulled my phone away from my ear. She wasn't answering. I walked out of the supply closet, making sure my phone was hidden.  
I needed to be sure she was okay, especially after what had happened the other night. I walked towards her dorm, hoping to get some answers when I happened to run into Guardian Belikov.  
"Guardian Belikov!" I called, he turned,  
"Hello Princess." He smiled politely, I groaned,  
"Oh, please don't call me that."  
He smiled, "What can I do for you?"  
"Did you see Rose this morning?"  
Dimitri's eye brows scrunched in confusion, "No. She wasn't in class, I was actually going to ask you the same thing. I'm on my way to her dorm."  
"Can I come with you?" I breathed anxiously. I saw he was about to argue,  
"I'll follow you even if you tell me no."  
He sighed, a small smile playing at his lips,  
"Come on."  
I nodded and walked with him to Rose's dorm. Something wasn't right, and I could feel it.  
"Is everything alright? The matron of the damphir dorms asked as we walked past her. I turned and looked at her,  
"We just need to check on Rose."  
I could tell she knew of what had happened to Rose, because she'd nodded. Usually, she would have pried more.  
I was more then relieved at this particular moment that Rose's room was close to the top of the stairs. I stood in front of it with Dimitri and knocked vigorously, waiting for her answer. But there was none.  
"Rose, open up! I know you're in there."  
No reply.  
"Rose." Dimitri said just loudly enough for her to hear. But again there was no answer.  
Dimitri sighed and pulled out a key, and slipped it into the key hole.  
I looked at him, "You guys can get into our rooms whenever you want?"  
Dimitri laugled, "You know…she said nearly the exact same th-"  
His words dropped off as the door opened. I froze, all the strength draining out of me, then I screamed. A blood curdling, eardrum bursting cry of fear. But not fear for us.  
I tried to run in, but Dimitri caught me around my waist.  
"NO! LET ME GO!" I screamed, and yet with only one arm around my waist, I couldn't escape him.  
Dimitri's phone was already out, and he said one simple word, 3 syllables, that I didn't understand.  
_Buria._  
But, I didn't give a damn. I continued to fight him with all that I had as he dropped his phone to the ground.  
"I need to go in there!" I screamed, He caught my wrist and turned us, shoving me against the wall, my wrists pinned on either side of my head. He had no intention of hurting me, I could see that in his eyes, but I could also see through the action that there was no way in hell that I would be escaping him. Another guardian ran up the stairs, he must have been the other one on patrol.  
"Stay. Here."  
"_No!" _  
"_Yes._ If you want me to make sure she's alright you will stay _right _here. If you fight Michael, I will stay here, and Rose will have to wait."  
I stilled, I always had hated that Moroi meant more than damphirs.  
"Fine." I whispered, and he ran in the door, leaving me with the other guardian. I slid to the ground, covering my mouth with my hands as tears filled my eyes. There was so much blood…_So _ much blood.  
The ground was soaked with it the walls and dresser had blood on them too. I had a sickening reality biting at me.  
If Rose was in there…she wasn't alive. But I could – I could bring her back! I hoped desperately.  
I waited…and waited, for any sign from Dimitri that she was alive, more guardians flooded the hall way and I heard Guardian Petrov order for a lock down on the school.  
Guardian Belikov walked back out, his face grief stricken,  
"She's gone."  
~*~*~

**What do you guys think? Please let me know! I'm really enjoying writing this story so far!  
-RMNicki-  
~*~*~**_**  
**_


	4. Courage & Willpower

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Vampire Academy Series or any of its characters, but this **_**is**_** my writing, and should not be used without my permission, thank you! Enjoy!**

Review of Last Chapter:  
The ground was soaked with it the walls and dresser had blood on them too. I had a sickening reality biting at me.  
If Rose was in there…she wasn't alive. But I could – I could bring her back! I hoped desperately.  
I waited…and waited, for any sign from Dimitri that she was alive, more guardians flooded the hall way and I heard Guardian Petrov order for a lock down on the school.  
Guardian Belikov walked back out, his face grief stricken,  
"She's gone."  
~*~*~

**Dimitri**

More guardians showed up a minute later, and it didn't take long for a forensics' team to be contacted. Petrov, Alto and I stayed around. The other guardians were guarding the school, being that we were now on code red.  
One of the male scientists stood from where he had been crouched on the ground, and approached us.  
"Did you find anything?" Alberta asked softly.  
"There's no finger prints. But, a strigoi wouldn't just…leave all this blood." The man looked confused, "But…" The man shook his head and sighed,  
"But?" I prompted,  
"There's too much blood here. It's all hers. And, if we do find her, it'll most likely be a body, not a person."  
My hand tightened into a fist and I had to use all my strength to relax it.  
I'm s-" The scientist began.  
"Boss…" One of the females said, standing and walking over to us.  
"Caroline?" He asked.  
"I think I found something."  
The man's eyes widened, "What is it?"  
"There's a pattern in the blood stains."  
"What do you mean?" The man asked, his brows furrowing,  
"Okay, so…" The woman began, addressing us all, "The blood on the ground has been –I can't give you an exact range of dates, but over a long period of time- but, it wasn't all spilled at the same time. It happened over at least a few months. The blood on the walls is fresh. _Some_ of the blood on the ground is fresh."  
"So she could be alive?" Stan asked.  
"_If_ she was abducted, she wasn't killed here. But my best guess is is that neither of those two things happened. I think if Rosemarie is with someone, they worked awfully hard at making it _seem_ like she was dead."  
I felt my eyes widen, but I pursed my lips and kept silent.  
"You think she's on the run again?" Stan asked Alberta.  
I bit my lip against the urge to defend her, and answered before Alberta could,  
"Yes and No. There's more to the story." I said.  
"What do you mean?" Stan asked,  
"Let's get a group together to go after her, we'll brief in the meeting room." Alberta said.  
"We'll need the Princess." I said as Alberta walked down the hallway, she turned,  
"Trust me." I said, and she nodded.  
~*~*~

"Princess, you need to tell them _everything_ that's going on." I coaxed.  
"I can't do that." Lissa whispered.  
"She could be in danger, princess." I replied, leaning against the table in front of where she was sitting.  
Lissa squirmed, "But-"  
I leaned in closer to her ear, so that only she could hear me, "I'm on her side, Lissa. If you don't tell us, they won't be willing to listen to her when they find her."  
I leaned back, and after a few seconds Lissa whispered,  
"Okay…"  
~*~*~

**Rose**  
"You can come out now, Rose." Dr. Olendszki said.  
I sighed, I wasn't really a fan of small spaces. I pushed up on the seat cushions above me, and sat up gingerly. I climbed out of the crevice and replaced the cushions, sitting on top of them, in the backseat.  
"Thank you for doing this." I whispered. She gave me a small sad smile in the mirror.  
"I hope you find him."  
"I will." I replied, softly, determined."Why are you helping me?" I whispered.  
She didn't reply at first, then she sighed, "I have children of my own Rosemarie. My daughter Anna died when she was seven. I know what it's like to lose a child."  
"Oh…" I breathed, "I'm so sorry."  
"It happened years ago, and when you came to me last night…I just _knew_ that I had to help you."  
I leaned forward, "And I'll be grateful for the rest of my life.  
A small smile tugged at her lips, "You don't need to be."  
I smiled and leaned back,  
"I have a flight arranged for you at the airport, it should help you to get there faster." She said. "It's under a fake name, Savannah Johnston."  
My eyes widened, I hadn't known about that. "You didn't need to do that."  
She laughed, "That doesn't change that I did."  
The car stopped, "Good luck, Rosemarie."  
"Thank you." I whispered, and stepped out.  
~*~*~

**Dimitri**

Tears slipped down Vasilisa's cheeks, and she took a shaky breath and stood, to face the rest of the table.  
"When Rose and I were living in the apartment you guys found us at , uhm, one night she went out –she…she said that it would only be for thirty minutes-" Lissa took in another wavering breath, "When she didn't come back, I became frantic, I knew that I wasn't supposed to leave. She told me-" Lissa gave a sad laugh, "She said she'd kill me if I did. But, for some reason, I had this strange feeling, like, _inside_ of me. I had no idea what it was. The bond had never worked more than one way so it didn't…It didn't even occur to me that that could be what it was. I fought it for as long as I could, and about an hour later…I felt this _really_ intense pain at the front of my head, and then it was like…I was _inside_ of her." Vasilisa paused,  
"Had she been attacked by strigoi?" Celeste asked.  
"I wish." Lissa whispered, guardians eyes around the room widened. "She wished the same. Anyways, when I was a part of her, I realized that she was in an alley. She was hurt." Tears filled Lissa's eyes, "Really bad." She choked, "She'd been grabbed off the streets by a couple guys. There was a gun, put to her head, and then the cowards _beat_ her, _holding_ her at gunpoint so that she couldn't do anything. Then….they um, they raped her. She told me there were only 2. But, when I talked to the doctors while she was sedated, they said that – that there were at least 4, and at most 7."  
It was silent for a few more seconds, "Why would she run again, she's safer here." Alberta asked, softly.  
Lissa looked to me and I nodded, she braced her hand on the table as if it were painful to talk,  
"Because a month and a half later we found out that she was pregnant."  
"Pregnant…" Celeste echoed.  
Lissa nodded and smiled, "Yeah. It was what saved her. Finding out that she was pregnant had killed her inside at first. She was depressed, but she refused to give up. Then, we went to her first appointment. We heard his heartbeat. I swear…I've never to this day seen a happiness on her face –other than when he was delivered- that is equal to that moment. Then, 8 months, 3 weeks, and 2 days later…She went into labor. She had a baby boy that she named Andrew. Spurred off of my brother's name, Andre." A sob shook Lissa's small frame, "Rose almost died. They both did. The aftereffects of the rape left her womb and her uterus damaged and the delivery…almost failed, but she just…she just wouldn't give up And at 3:09am, Andrew was born. They let her out of the hospital a week and a half later, it took a lot longer than most mothers, for her to recover, and the doctors wanted to keep an eye on her and Andrew. He was 3 mos. old when she felt that you guys were getting close. She handed him off for a 'week' to a friend of ours, and…We just kind of disappeared. She's gone after him."  
"What is all the blood from, then?" Stan asked.  
"I-I don't know…" Lissa whispered, "Maybe it was someone else's?"  
"No." I replied softly, and the eyes turned to me, "It's hers. The doctor told me last night that Rose had a deep cut on the side of her ribs. One that had scabbed over and been reopened multiple times. My best guess is that, she staged her own death."  
Alberta sat back in her chair, her face ashen, "What lengths would you go to, to get your baby back?"  
"And who was it that helped her to get out?" James added.  
~*~*~

**Rose**  
I pulled my knees to my chest on the plane, wrapping my arms tightly around them. I had to find him, _I had to._ I felt like, without Andrew, I was missing pieces. What if he was in danger, and I wasn't there to protect him? What if he was hungry? What if he was being neglected? Or hit? Or he'd been abandoned?! I placed my hand over my stomach and swallowed against the intense nausea that –had I been standing- would have knocked me off my feet.  
"Are you alright, miss?" An old lady next to me asked with a small smile, "Usually people don't get sick till they get in the air."  
I cracked a smile, "No, I'm fine, just….Pregnant."  
I lied. But I wish I hadn't been.  
"Ooh! Congratulations, but you look awfully young, how old are you sweetheart?"  
_You think I'm young now._ I thought softly, wondering what her reaction would be if she'd known I was pregnant at 15.  
"I'm 16." I whispered.  
"Oh." The old lady murmured, "Who's the father?"  
I knew the old woman was only being kind, but the question still hurt. Tears filled my eyes and I swallowed them back,  
"I don't know."  
The woman's lips opened in a silent 'o'.  
"Oh my God." She stammered, "I-I'm so sorry."  
She placed her hand over mine, and I smiled.  
"It's alright now." I whispered. "I'm getting a little surprise gift out of it."  
The woman smiled, "That's a good outlook to have sweetheart."  
I smiled, "Thank you."  
She nodded, "Any woman with as much courage and willpower as you deserves a helping hand every once in a while."  
A tear rolled down my cheek,  
_Courage and Willpower._ I thought to myself. I guess that was what my mission could be referred to as.  
The woman put her hand over my stomach,  
"May God bless you both and keep you safe." She whispered.  
I bit my lip, "Yeah," I whispered, "I hope so."  
~*~*~

**What did you guys think!? I am SO sorry that took so long. I was on vacation for 2 weeks, and was totally planning on uploading new chapters, but guess what!? NO internet connection! Serves me right, I guess. Wanting to use technology on vacation. Oh well. (: I hope this chapter made up for that a little bit, let me know! I value your opinions, greatly!  
-RMNicki-  
~*~*~**


	5. You Have Beautiful Hair

_**Disclaimer: I do not own the Vampire Academy series of any of its characters, but this is my writing and should not be used without my permission. Thank you for reading!**_

_~*~*~  
Review of Last Chapter:  
The old woman smiled, "Any woman with as much courage and willpower as you deserves a helping hand every once in a while."  
A tear rolled down my cheek,  
Courage and Willpower. I thought to myself. I guess that was what my mission could be referred to as.  
The woman put her hand over my stomach,  
"May God bless you both and keep you safe." She whispered.  
I bit my lip, "Yeah," I whispered, "I hope so."  
~*~*~_

**Dimitri**

Going through Rose's room, I had found a small black journal that was tied with a leather strip. Later that night, I had gone back to my room, and although I felt slightly guilty, I knew that reading it would be for the best. I started at the beginning,

_May 3__rd_

_I hate hospitals.  
Especially now…The doctors are a constant annoyance, although I know they're only trying to help. Lissa's here. She always is. She even sleeps here with me in a bed nearby. Most nights though, she sleeps with me in her arms as I cry. There's nearly nobody in the world that has ever seen me break down this way. I haven't spoken a word since what happened. And only a few to her. I know it hurts her, but I'm so ashamed, I can't even stand to look at myself in the mirror. I hate myself. I hate everything about me. And, if it weren't for the job of protecting Lissa, I would have killed myself by now.  
I stole one of the doctor's scalpels…  
I went into the bathroom earlier today and used it to cut myself, the way I knew Lissa had in the past. I was disgusted with myself for having done it, but at the same time…God, it helped. The doctors found it and had gone as far to stitch it up. I hadn't known it was that deep. They didn't ask. I'm sure they thought it was just from the attack.  
Everything hurts. I hate myself even more for admitting that. But, between my legs is the worst pain I've ever felt. The bruises, cuts and other wounds are no comparison.  
I want to die. I'm used and dirty now, and there's no changing what's happened. _

I flipped the pages slowly going through them, cringing each time I read about Roza reopening the wound in her side or talking about how much she hated herself. I scanned pages, until I reached the day she'd found out she was pregnant,

_May 19__th_

_I'm pregnant.  
I found out today. I have an actual doctors' appointment two days from now. Lissa dragged me out of the house long enough for us to pick up 5 pregnancy tests, and 2 gallons of grape juice. I swear…I've never drank that many liquids in one day in my life. All of the tests, except for one came out positive. I can't be pregnant…I could never be a mother. That baby will be half monster. But I still can't bring myself to abort it. I can't kill an innocent life when I've spent all my life training to __**save**__ them. I wish I'd died when those men had violated me. I wish I hadn't been so weak as to have let them do that to me. I trained 2 hours a day __**every**__ day to be able to prevent situations with things 10x as strong as the men that did this to me, and yet….I failed. _

I felt sick as I read about how Rose had blamed herself about what had happened to her, and how she'd felt that she'd _let_ those men do that to her. I flipped through the pages of her pregnancy including the first time she'd heard his heartbeat, then each appointment and each fear, then to the day she'd left him with a babysitter.

_April 23__rd_

_Andrew is 3 months, 2 days today. I know the guardians are getting closer. I can feel it in my heart as my baby is placed in more and more danger every day. I can't let him get caught in the cross fire. What kind of mother would that make me? I'm going to hand him off to Annamarie and her family for…Well, I don't really know how long.  
I love him more than my own life, and although it's going to haunt me for however long I am away from him… It's my responsibility to do what's best for him.  
And that's what I will do.  
~*~*~_

**Rose**

"Miss?"  
I looked to my right to see a flight attendant standing beside me,  
"Would you like anything to drink or eat?" She asked softly.  
The old lady from earlier leaned across towards me, "Try gingerale. It'll help with your stomach."  
I nodded and the flight attendant handed me a green can and a clear plastic up.  
"Thank you." I murmured, and she smiled and walked off.  
"1 hour left." The old lady whispered beside me and I smiled, "Thank you."  
"Do you know where you're going when you get there, sweetheart?" She asked.  
I sagged slightly, having not worked that detail out just yet, "Not yet." I replied, not meeting her eyes.  
"Well now you do." She said, and I looked up at her in confusion,  
"What?"  
"You're coming home with me. You can stay with me and my son for a while until you get back on your feet."  
"You don't need to do that. I have money for a hotel." I whispered.  
"You'll be safer with me, sweetheart. I'm not taking no for an answer." She said kindly, and I laughed,  
"Thank you."

…

"We're almost there," the sweet old lady said, leading me to baggage claim, "My son will meet us in the parking lot, he insists on me not driving because of my eye sight."  
"You really don't need to do this. I don't want to be a bur- "  
"You _won't_ be. Trust me sweetheart." She said, and I closed my lips and simply nodded.  
I helped her to grab her bags and we made our way out to her car.  
"Michael!" The old lady grinned, "What a surprise to see you here."  
The man smiled, "You know how it is."  
I paused where I was, drinking in the view of the young man before me. He was probably about 21, 5'11, with blue eyes, but…he _really_ sounded familiar.  
There was that part of me that instantly said, maybe he was one of _them_. But, I pushed the thought away before it could freak me out. What were the chances?  
"Michael, this is Rosemarie. She'll be staying with us for a while."  
The young man looked towards me, and his eyes widened slightly, and he stuck his hand out,  
"Michael." He introduced, "Did you used to live here? I think we went to school together."  
I smiled, relieved, "Yes, please call me Rose."  
He nodded, and opened the back door for me,  
"You have beautiful hair." He said, and I froze in my spot.  
_You have beautiful hair.  
You have beautiful hair.  
You have beautiful hair.  
_I stumbled backwards,  
"Rosemarie?" The woman asked, but I couldn't look away from the man before me, his eyes darkened slightly and my stomach rolled.  
I fought back the mind numbing urge to scream, and instead took off in the other direction,  
"ROSE!" The man yelled, but I was already gone.  
~*~*~

**Dimitri**

I woke in the morning and picked Rose's journal back up to read more of it. It only took about 20 minutes, before I sat straight up when I located the page that told me where she was and what her plans were in her escape attempt out of Montana. It was unlike Rose to leave a clue behind, but I wasn't surprised that in her rush to go after her son, she'd been a little scattered.  
I found Alberta in the training room and she listened closely as I told her what I had found out.  
"Let's call a meeting." She said, and I nodded.  
…

Kirova had sent out a half dozen guardians to go after Roza, and we were on the private jet now. What _was_ surprising though, was that she had let the Princess come with us. I had a pretty good idea of how it had happened though, and had spent about 10 minutes of the ride chastising Lissa about how dangerous it was for her to be doing that sort of thing.  
"I know Guardian Belikov." She murmured, using my formal name, "I just, I can't…I think that maybe…If I'm there, she'll react better. Maybe…She'll be more cooperative."  
I nodded, and placed my hand on her shoulder,  
"We're going to get her back Princess. That much I know."  
"She'd rather die than let you guys bring her back here without Andrew." She said, looking up at me.  
I nodded, I knew it was true. I had talked to Alberta about it, choosing her not only because she was head of the search, but also because she was female and had had a baby in her life, I knew she'd be more likely to be able to connect to Rose on a personal level. I'd even gently suggested that maybe we should try to locate Andrew also. Because, as Lissa had said, Rose wouldn't cooperate unless we were able to reunite the two of them.  
"I know Princess." I sighed, "I know."  
The princess sat up straight, surprisingly quick, her eyes wide and glazed over with terror.  
"What is it?" I asked leaning forward.  
"Oh my God." She choked,  
"Princess?" I asked, cautiously. Alberta stood and walked back to us,  
"Is everything alright?"  
"_Lissa_ what's wrong?"  
But she wouldn't reply,  
"It's the bond…" Alberta said, slightly mystified.  
I looked down, when out of the corner of my eyes, I saw a bead of crimson.  
I grabbed Lissa's wrists and held them apart from each other where her nails had been digging into her own skin.  
Then she sagged, and her muscles relaxed.  
I let go of her wrists and she put them to her face and began to sob.  
"What is it?" I asked softly, hiding the fear in my voice, trying to keep her calm, "What's happened? Is Rose alright?"  
"No!" Lissa sobbed, "One of them found her!"  
"What do you mean?" Alberta asked, straightening.  
"One of the men that attacked her found her at the airport! He's running after her! He's going to hurt her!"  
"Lissa, Lissa look at me." I ordered, and she shakily moved her eyes to mine,  
"You said there was only one?" I asked, and she nodded miserably.  
"Listen to me when I say this," I said gently, "Rose can take care of herself, especially if there's only one. Trust me on this."  
Slowly she relaxed, "Maybe you're right." She whimpered. "Oh God…Rose…What have you gotten yourself into?"  
~*~*~*~

**So, you all know, classes have started up again, and that's why my updates are separated by so many days. I'm trying though guys and I am **_**not**_** going to drop any of my stories, I promise! Anyways, I hope you liked this chapter, please review! I really enjoy hearing from you guys, and it brightens my day to hear constructive criticism and/or if you guys are enjoying it! Any ideas I get I'll place a thank you at the beginning of the chapter with the username of the person who suggested it! Or…maybe the end of the chapter so that it doesn't give anything away, I'm not sure just yet. But, anyways, hope you're enjoying! **

**-RMNicki-  
~*~*~**


	6. The Grandson

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Vampire Academy Series, but this story is my writing and should not be used without my permission.  
Thank you for reading! **

**-RMNicki-**

**~*~*~  
Review of Last Chapter:  
"No!" Lissa sobbed, "One of them found her!"  
"What do you mean?" Alberta asked, straightening.  
"One of the men that attacked her found her at the airport! He's running after her! He's going to hurt her!"  
"Lissa, Lissa look at me." I ordered, and she shakily moved her eyes to mine,  
"You said there was only one?" I asked, and she nodded miserably.  
"Listen to me when I say this," I said gently, "Rose can take care of herself, especially if there's only one. Trust me on this."  
Slowly she relaxed, "Maybe you're right." She whimpered. "Oh God…Rose…What have you gotten yourself into?"  
~*~*~**

**Rose  
**I ran for what I felt was my life. I knew I could take the man that was following me, but god there was just something in me…I needed to get out of here. I couldn't do it. I couldn't do it!  
I slowed and hid behind a corner, so that I could think. This man had _raped_ me. He'd nearly _killed_ me.  
And I was running from him. It should be the other way around.  
I stopped. We were still in the parking garage.  
"Rose. I know you're here, somewhere!" He called, and I flinched, my stomach rolling. I heard him getting closer to my hiding place, and I knew I had to make a choice, it was either keep running, or turn and face one of my worst nightmares….  
I wasn't going to run for the rest of my life.  
He was 2 feet away now, I swung out and caught him in the cheek. He snarled as I swung him into the wall, shoving my forearm into his throat, cutting off his air supply.  
"So, you're into S&M, huh?" He rasped, then groped me, between my legs. I froze and he shoved me off of him so that I fell to the ground.  
He jumped on me, straddling me,  
"Need a re-run sweetheart?" He asked, and I felt him undo my jeans,  
"GET _OFF!" _I screamed, bucking my hips to try to get him off me.  
"Do that again, baby." He moaned.  
I screamed and threw a fist up punching him, he snarled, and pulled out a pocket knife.  
Hell no.  
I grabbed at it and he sliced my hand, I shoved the pain out of my mind and grabbed for it again, blocking him from cutting my throat.  
I shoved it back up and cut his cheek.  
His eyes flashed and he smiled wickedly, and while my hands were occupied with deflecting the knife, his other hand shot down my pants and panties and he cupped my sex.  
I screamed bloody murder as unwanted memories forced themselves to the front of my mind, he began to try and penetrate me, and I grabbed the knife, snapping his wrist, before slashing it across his chest, he yelled,  
"You're going to pay for that you little bitch." He snarled,  
"Go to hell." I rasped.  
_**BANG!**_  
I screamed and the man fell to the side. I shoved him away, scrambling away to stare at him where he lay on the ground, moaning, blood leaking out of his side.  
I looked over to the side, breathlessly to see the old woman, holding a gun She knelt next to me, and I flinched knowing that she'd meant to shoot me.  
"I always knew there was something off about him." She murmured, softly, "Are you alright?"  
I nodded, blankly, I looked towards him again, "But – but, he's your gran-grandson."  
"I also had a grand daughter." She said sourly, "She used to live with me, and I never understood why she was so quiet around him, then finally she moved out and never looked back. I haven't heard from her in over two years. Was he one of the ones that hurt you?"  
I looked down and she nodded,  
"It's alright." She said gently, "Let's get you out of here."  
"But-" I said, looking over to the wheezing man on the ground.  
"There's police coming. He'll be fine." She said, lamely, helping me up.  
I looked down and redid my jeans,  
"Let' go, sweetheart." She said softly, "You can still stay with me." She looked back at her grandson, "I have an open room now."  
~*~*~

**Dimitri**

We got off the jet and moved towards the airport in assigned cars, quickly. There were police men around on the 3rd level. Most of them guardians. They had been alerted of Rose's disappearance and we had gotten the call when they'd identified her getting off the plane.  
"Did you see where she went?" Alberta asked, eyeing the man's body on the ground with disgust.  
"No. She left too fast." Another said.  
I cursed in Russian, and then heard Lissa let out a small scream, I turned and looked at her to see that she'd run from Xavier who had been watching her in the car.  
Xavier looked dazed, and I knew that Lissa had used compulsion.  
She was staring at the blood on the floor.  
"Vasilisa." I said using her full name and she swallowed and looked towards me, tears in her eyes,  
"Rose?" She whispered.  
"No." I replied, "Only some of it is hers. It's not a deadly amount. The rest is the man's on the ground. I told you…She can take care of herself."  
Lissa nodded slowly,  
"You compelled Xavier." I said quietly, and she looked up at me guiltily,  
"We'll talk about that later." I said sternly, and she sighed and nodded.  
"_We have a location!" _I heard a yell and spun along with the other 5 we had come with.  
"What are you talking about?" Alberta asked.  
"We were able to pull the camera footage from here, and saw her with an old lady at her car. We got a license plate number, and some of ours were able to track them down. They don't know we tracked them to the house yet. But, we have an address."  
I relaxed, and nodded, she was safe. Well, as safe as she could be.  
"I think you guys should see the footage." The man said, and I tensed again, "What happened?" The man just gestured to the security room, and we followed.

The video showed Rose running, looking absolutely terrified, then she'd stopped around the corner. She seemed to debate something, and something Lissa had said to me before when she'd been telling me what had happened to Rose came to the forefront of my mind.  
_She couldn't fight back because they held her at gunpoint.  
_No...  
The man came near the corner, and Rose swung out, catching him directly in the face, then spun him shoving him against the wall and choking off his air supply. He said something, then groped her, she faltered, and I growled low in my throat. He shoved her to the ground and straddled her. He taunted her and she tried to throw him off and I saw that it turned him on. My hands tightened into fists, then she hit him and he pulled out a knife. She deflected the first time, but it sliced her hand open. She went for it again, stopping him from cutting her throat. Then a smile lit his face that set me on edge, and his hands shot down her pants and her panties and she screamed as he fondled her. Then she'd had enough. She snapped his wrist, and he yelled before she ran the knife across his chest.  
Then he fell to the side, and we saw the old lady walk into the frame holding a gun.  
"That's the end of it." The other guardian said, stopping the tape.  
It took me a few seconds to calm, but then I walked out.  
"What-what happened?" Lissa gasped, "Alberta wouldn't let me in to see!"  
"She's alright." I said, "I need that address I said, and Alberta nodded.  
"We already have it."  
~*~*~

**Rose  
**I was still feeling shaken when the old woman opened the door on my side of her car.  
I blinked,  
"I'm sorry." I murmured, "I didn't realize we were here."  
"You're in shock, sweetheart, come on."  
"You really don't need to do this." I whispered, "I have money for-"  
"Oh hush." She said, "It's not a bother."  
I closed my lips, smiling slightly as she led me in.  
She took my hand and pulled me towards the back,  
"Here's your room." She said, smiling and opening a door for me, my eyes widened when I saw it.  
It had a pale blue and black theme to it.  
"Like I said," The old woman said, "I had a grand-daughter once. She left a while back."  
"Ah…" I said a little hesitantly, "Are you sure it's okay for me to be…you know, staying in her room?"  
"I insist on it." She replied, "And she would too. She's about 23 now, with a baby." The old woman smiled, and walked over to the closet, opening it,  
"She was about your size, these should fit you."  
"But I-"  
She tossed me a pair of pj shorts and a tank top,  
"Once you get to know me Rosemarie, you'll find that I am a very stubborn in my old age, and rarely lost an argument. Everything you need should be in here. Dinner should be ready in about 30 minutes. By the way, call me Annabelle."  
"Thank you." I whispered, and she winked, before walking out, shutting the door behind her.  
I sighed, and sat on the bed, staring down at my fingers. I couldn't believe it. This old lady, someone who barely knew me, had reached her hand out to me in a time of need and taken me into her home. Had _shot_ her grandson over me. I shook my head, sighing before standing back up. There was a bathroom nearby and after debating it for a second, I walked in and turned the shower on, before looking under the sink, it brought a small wave of sorrow to see the array of body washes and hair products that had likely belonged to her granddaughter. I sighed, and pulled out a few before undressing and climbing into the shower.  
I looked down at the cut on my ribs, and the light stretch marks on my stomach where I had carried Andrew inside me.  
I took a deep stuttering breath and showered and shaved before getting out and getting dressed in the clothing that the-…that Annabelle had given me.  
I looked in the mirror and winced at what I saw. I was pale, and had crescents beneath my eyes, due to my lack of sleep.  
I yanked a brush I had found through my hair, until it was smooth and walked out to meet Annabelle, trying to force all of the painful thoughts swirling through my mind, out.  
"Hi…" I murmured hesitantly and Annabelle smiled brightly, before handing me a plate of food.  
Throughout the night, I slowly relaxed, feeling more at home as Annabelle coaxed me into watching movies and playing board games.  
I knew that getting close to her would be inevitable if I stayed long, so I settled on only staying for four days while I searched for Andrew in this city.  
~*~*~

**Dimitri  
**"We'll find her tomorrow, Belikov." Alberta said, quietly, and I looked towards her.  
She was watching out the front windshield as we drove towards the city,  
"I-"  
"You think I don't know how you two feel about each other?" She asked, her lips twitching into a smile, "I'm not as stupid as you think."  
I sighed, knowing that arguing would be futile. In the 8 months that I had been training Roza, she had definitely found a special place in my heart. I wanted her. And I hadn't known that. Not until recently, when she had disappeared and I didn't know where she was or if she was in danger.  
"I know you're not stupid." I replied, "But I am."  
This time she couldn't fight her smile, "Most men are. You don't know what you've got till it's gone."  
"She's not gone. I'll go to any lengths to find her."  
~*~*~

**I hope you liked it guys! Sorry, it's been so long, but as I promised in my profile, I'll never leave a story un-finished! So here's the next chapter, it's about to get even more interesting! Let me know what you think, if you have any idea, constructive criticism, etc. I like to hear it all! **

**-RMNicki-  
~*~*~**


	7. Tonight

Hey guys, I wanted to give you my sincere apology about not updating quick enough now-a-days. I have school, and I'm recently fostering puppies for a nearby dog shelter. It's where they come live with us and we take care of them until they're adopted so that they don't have to sit in cages all day. And, we recently had one that was marking EVERY WHERE. (Including wells, furniture, shoes, my DOG, etc.) So anyways, he's been adopted and we now have black lab puppies, and they're a little better behaved(: I hope to be updating quicker now and hope you can forgive me! I'm planning on having another chapter up tonight and another by next week! I love you all, and thank you for reading!

-RMNicki-


	8. Sunrise

**~*~*~  
Review of Last Chapter:  
Dimitri  
**"We'll find her tomorrow, Belikov." Alberta said, quietly, and I looked towards her.  
She was watching out the front windshield as we drove towards the city,  
"I-"  
"You think I don't know how you two feel about each other?" She asked, her lips twitching into a smile, "I'm not as stupid as you think."  
I sighed, knowing that arguing would be futile. In the 8 months that I had been training Roza, she had definitely found a special place in my heart. I wanted her. And I hadn't known that. Not until recently, when she had disappeared and I didn't know where she was or if she was in danger.  
"I know you're not stupid." I replied, "But I am."  
This time she couldn't fight her smile, "Most men are. You don't know what you've got till it's gone."  
"She's not gone. I'll go to any lengths to find her."  
~*~*~

**Rose**

I stayed up most the night per usual. But, when I was able to drift off for a few minutes, I always dreamed of Dimitri and Lissa. I knew Lissa would be hurting. And as for Dimitri…I knew we had something special, and he was likely going to kill me for running off.  
I didn't know how things would end for me at the academy. Kirova had made it very clear that if I ran off again that I would be leaving the academy for good, whether I wanted to or not. I sighed, and curled into a ball closing my eyes as tears rolled down my cheeks.  
I had to find Andrew…I had to. He was what would get me through all of this.  
I felt myself drift off against my will, knowing exactly what nightmare would be haunting me tonight.

…

When I woke up, I was luckily face down in my pillow so that when I screamed, it didn't wake Annabelle. After I'd calmed enough to breathe semi-normal, I looked out the window and saw that it was sunrise, and knew that there was no way in hell I'd be able to get back to sleep.  
I sighed and stood, I truly was a little uncomfortable wearing another girls' things but Annabelle was persistent. I also saw that she'd taken my other clothes, I smiled, and stifled a laugh, not knowing how far away her room was.  
I opened the closet and was shocked to see that the things inside were actually in good shape and were nice.  
I picked out a pair of holey jeans a blue v-neck aeropostale shirt, and a black under shirt. I usually stereotyped girls who wore aeropostale clothing as stuck up, but it truly was kind of cute. I bit my lip for a second, but my question was answered when I looked over to the door and saw a plastic bag lying there. I opened it and laughed quietly at the array of new bras and packages of panties inside.  
The woman was…smart. 2 out of the three bras fit, and the panties inside were lacy and honestly…pretty cute.  
"What have I turned into?" I murmured to myself before getting dressed. The clothing were tight and hugged my figure in all the right places.  
_Looking to get taken advantage of again? _ A dark thought ran through my head. I shivered and choked back the urge to vomit.  
_No girl asks to be raped._ I reminded myself, walking over to the book shelf to entertain myself until Annabelle woke up.

~*~*~  
**Dimitri**

By 9am, it had been decided that Alberta and I would be the ones to bring Rose back.  
"What about Andrew?" I asked, the question we were both thinking about.  
Alberta smiled slightly, "I talked to Kirova. She said that they have enough guardians for now and that we have permission to help find Rose's baby up until we're needed back." Alberta sighed sadly, "And I hate to break protocol, but if we _are_ called back… We're going to let Rose go. This is her baby we're talking about and there's no doubt in my mind that she'll attempt to run over and over again until she succeeds to get back out."  
I nodded, "That sounds like Rose."  
"We're ten minutes away." Alberta breathed, "How are we going to do this?"  
"Chances are the old lady knows now what happened to her. If I go up there, she'll be suspicious. My guess is is that Rose will try to run. I'll be out back and catch her when she does. She has training Petrov. She's been pretending for a while and I'm sure she'll put up a hell of a fight."  
Alberta nodded, "Let's do this."  
She parked the car about a block way and we made our way towards the house. I hated to scare Rose like this, but she needed to hear us out. This time we were on _her_ side, and I wanted her to know that.  
I walked around the house, hiding in the trees in the back. It made a good place for coverage.  
_"Be ready, Belikov_." I heard Alberta through the ear piece in my ear,  
"Copy."  
I heard her conversing with the lady, then the woman call for Rose. I tensed when I heard Alberta yell Rose's name and running footsteps. Rose yanked the back door open, and saw me at the top of the porch stairs. She hesitated at the sight of me, but heard Alberta behind her. She looked to the side,  
"Rose, _don't!" _I said, as she ran for the edge of the porch, and pounced onto the top of it, then jumped over the side. She dropped the 20 feet to the ground and hit the grass, rolling, then she stood and I let out a sigh of relief. I saw her face contort in pain for a moment, but in the next second she was up and running as fast as she could for the woods.  
"Son of a-"  
I ran down the steps, hearing Alberta talking to the old lady gently, consoling her. I darted into the woods, following Rose's trail.  
"Rose!" I yelled, "_Roza!"  
_I heard a twig snap above me about 5 minutes later and looked up to see her perched in a tree, about 30 feet up. I knew as far up as she was, the tree wouldn't support me _or_ Alberta if we tried to climb after her.  
I followed her as she jumped from tree to tree nearly giving me a heart attack, and then I lost her again.  
She jumped down from a nearby branch and ran, and I shot after her.  
She was a fast runner, incredibly fast. But I was never a slow one either. After about 5 minutes of pure sprinting I lunged forward and caught her around her waist, making sure I was the one to hit the ground first, not knowing if she was hurt from her fall earlier or not.  
She screamed, and thrashed in my arms, and I tightened my grip.  
"_Let me go, Dimitr!" _She screamed, as I turned us so that her back was on the ground and I was straddling her. I caught her wrists after she's gotten a hit in and pinned them above her head. She continued to thrash wildly, doing everything she could to get me off of her and I nearly lost her once.  
She screamed in frustration, but refused to give up.  
"_Rose." _ I said sternly, "Do you need another shot? I have one, a sedative that will cause you to lose consciousness nearly immediately."  
Tears filled her eyes, "Pl-please." She begged.  
"Hey, look at me." I said gently, "I know about him. I know you're trying to find your baby."  
She froze, her eyes wide, "I-"  
I slowly wrapped my arms around her and pulled her up,  
"We want to help you Rose. _I_ want to help you."  
"We're not completely heartless." Alberta said, walking into the small clearing.  
Tears filled Rose's eyes,  
"You're not going to drag me back to the academy?"  
"Not yet." I said, placing my hand at the small of her back, and she let out a breath of relief,  
"That's not comforting at all."  
I laughed,  
"Come on, let's go."  
…..

On the way back, Rose had been tense and I knew by her facial expressions that she was in pain.  
Annabelle had packed her a small bag when we'd run after her, and Rose cried and hugged her tightly, exchanging numbers,  
"Call me Rosemarie if you ever need, _anything." _She said, and Rose smiled and hugged her again.  
"Rose." The woman called again and reached her hand out to place a small ipod and head phones into Rose's hand,  
"What-"  
"Don't argue." The old lady winked, "I'll win. That was my grand-daughters once upon a time. Just listen."  
Rose nodded, and smiled before following us back to the car, somewhat unsure.  
"We aren't lying to you Rose." I said softly, "We want to help you."  
I opened the back door for her and she climbed in, buckling herself in, and placed the headphones in her ears, settling in.  
"She's staying in your room." Alberta said as we climbed into the car, and I looked over at her surprised, "She'll be more comfortable with you. And, I want you to look her over, see if she needs medical treatment."  
I swallowed and nodded, I wasn't about to argue.  
Once we were parked in front of the hotel; I saw that Rose had fallen asleep in the back. Alberta grabbed her carry-on, and I carefully removed the ipod and headphones from Roza's ears, slipping them into my pocket before picking her up bridal style and carrying her towards my room.  
The others came out of theirs, hearing us,  
"Is she alright?" Stan asked.  
I nodded, "We think so, she made a 20 foot jump to get away from us."  
Celeste looked surprised, "Brave little thing."  
Lissa walked out and Alberta made a shooshing gesture to her, and she smiled, with tears in her eyes, seeing Rose again.  
I carried Rose into my room and she stirred at the sound of the door closing,  
"Wh-where are we?"  
"A hotel." I said quietly.  
"Put me down." She murmured.  
I sat on the bed, and instead wrapped my arms around her, going out on a limb and kissing her head,  
"What if I don't want to put you down?"  
She chuckled softly, but relaxed in my arms,  
"I don't want you to put me down either."  
I lay back and held her against my side, and she lay her head against my chest.  
"You're really going to help me find him?" She asked.  
"Yes." I replied, running my hand through her hair. She propped herself up, looking down at me,  
"Why do you care so much?"  
"Because we-"  
"No." She cut in, "Not them. _Y__ou."  
_My eyes widened and I sat up, catching her chin with my fingers, so she was looking in my eyes.  
"Why do you think I care?"  
"I don't know, I mean…when I saw you guys, I thought you were just going to drag me back. I was sad to see you, I thought you were on their side, and-"  
I leaned down and kissed her, cutting off the rest of what she was going to say. She sighed, and I soaked it up, running my tongue gently along the outside of her lips until she allowed me entrance.  
I pulled back after a few seconds and her eyes were a little unfocused and I was short of breath,  
"I've been waiting for a _long_ time to do that." I said, and she laughed breathlessly,  
"That's the first time that the thought of a guy touching me hasn't terrified me."  
"That was more than a thought." I said and she smiled,  
"Thank you." She whispered.  
"For what?" I asked, confused.  
"For being the one that can touch me without scaring me, _and_ for helping me to find my son."  
~*~*~

Let me know what you guys think! I'd greatly appreciate it!(:

-RMNicki-


	9. Because His Life Mattered More Than Mine

_~*~*~  
Review of Last Chapter:  
_**Dimitri**_  
"Why do you care so much?" She asked me.  
"Because we-"  
"No." She cut in, "Not them. __You."__  
__My eyes widened and I sat up, catching her chin with my fingers, so she was looking in my eyes.  
"Why do you think I care?"  
"I don't know, I mean…when I saw you guys, I thought you were just going to drag me back. I was sad to see you, I thought you were on their side, and-"  
I leaned down and kissed her, cutting off the rest of what she was going to say. She sighed, and I soaked it up, running my tongue gently along the outside of her lips until she allowed me entrance.  
I pulled back after a few seconds and her eyes were a little unfocused and I was short of breath,  
"I've been waiting for a __long__ time to do that." I said, and she laughed breathlessly,  
"That's the first time that the thought of a guy touching me hasn't terrified me."  
"That was more than a thought." I said and she smiled,  
"Thank you." She whispered.  
"For what?" I asked, confused.  
"For being the one that can touch me without scaring me, __and__ for helping me to find my son." _

~*~*~  
**Author's Note:  
Okay, so I know that this chapter isn't too 'actiony', but I figured you guys could use a sweet Rose/Dimitri chapter, and there's a little bit of a twist at the end. Hope you guys enjoy!  
~*~*~**

**Rose**

It had been two days since Dimitri and the others had agreed to help me. The family I had left Andrew with had given him up to the system a month after I didn't return, I was upset with them, don't get me wrong. But, I didn't blame them. I should have come sooner. I should have been a better mother. I was supposed to protect him, and I screwed it up. The family had been angrier than hell, but Dimitri had come up with a story that had them instantly regretting their harsh words to me. I asked him later why and he said that he wasn't going to let them get away with hurting me the way that they did without them feeling a little guilty too.  
But that didn't take out the hurt of what they'd said to me.  
Afterwards, I had sat in the passenger seat of the car with my knees to my chest, and my face hidden. When we'd made it to the hotel, Dimitri had grabbed me out of the back before I could get out myself and picked me up, carrying me up to the room we were sharing.  
"Dimitri, put me down!" I protested, and he sighed, but answered resolutely,  
"No."  
I'd begun to argue with him, but stopped when he put me down gently on the bed in our room. I looked up at him to see a storminess in his eyes, that I couldn't quite comprehend.  
"What's wrong?" I asked, softly.  
He knelt in front of me,  
"You really took to heart, those things they said."  
I bit my lip, "They were right."  
"_Don't_ say that Rose. For Gods' sake, look at that cut on your side, remember how many times you opened it! Think about all the sleepless nights, and the not eating. And your health issues because of how much you worried. A mother that didn't care would _never_ react that way to losing her son. Never."  
"But it was my fa-"  
"I suggest you don't say what I think you're about to say."  
I shut my mouth, and looked away, shocked by the warning in his voice.  
"Look at me, Roza."  
I shook my head, ashamed, "No."  
He grabbed my chin and turned my face towards him, so that I had to meet his eyes.  
"You've done everything you could to get him back. Look at the lengths you've gone to. And they are _one_ family. Four people. Their opinions don't matter. What _does_ matter is whether or not we find him. That's what you need to focus on. Don't blame this on yourself. You've done everything in your power to protect that little boy, and I am so proud of you. So proud. I can't wait to meet Andrew, not just because I want to find him, but because he's half _you._ And if he possesses half the potential and beautiful personality that you have then he could move mountains, and rearrange the stars."  
I shattered at his kind words, and a sob shook my body. Dimitri caught me as I fell, and held me tightly in his arms, rocking me for an hour before I finally began to calm down.  
"You're okay." He murmured. "Everything's going to be okay."  
"You think, we'll find him?" I choked, and I felt him nod,  
"With you, anything could happen."  
I wrapped my arms around his neck and straddled his legs, pressing myself close,  
"Thank you."  
His hands moved, beneath the back of my shirt, slowly, gauging whether or not I would protest.  
I sighed as his fingers pressed against my tense muscles.  
"I can tell just by the state of the muscles in your back how stressed you've been. Does it hurt?"  
I squirmed, "No."  
"You're lying." He stated, and I pressed my face into his shoulder.  
"I have an idea." He said gently after a few seconds, and helped me up.  
"Where are you going?" I whispered, and he smiled, "I'll be right back. In the meantime, take your shirt off."  
"Wh-" But he was already gone.  
I plopped down on the bed for a moment, confused. What was he going to do?  
I knew he wouldn't have sex with me right now. That just wasn't Dimitri's way, and although I wanted him, I knew he would see it as him taking advantage of me, and what I was going through.  
Damn his courtesy and manners.  
I went into the bathroom and washed my face, and brushed my hair. I knew my appearance didn't really matter to him, but I wanted to feel as if I had a semblance of control over myself.  
I bit my lip, and slowly removed my shirt, staring at myself in the mirror. I was only wearing a lacy black bra that Annabelle had gotten me, but I was covered.  
This was the first time, a man would be seeing me shirtless since…what had happened.  
"It's not even similar." I murmured, not feeling the least bit scared as I'd thought I would.  
The door to the room opened and I jumped,  
"Rose?" Dimitri called, and I opened the door of the bathroom, peering around it.  
He smiled,  
"Come on out."  
I bit my lip, surprised that I was embarrassed.  
"I don't know…"  
He walked closer, but didn't reach for me,  
"You have nothing to be ashamed of, and you know I won't hurt you."  
I nodded and slowly opened the door, knowing he was right.  
He swallowed when he saw me, but took a deep breath, I smiled, and couldn't resist,  
"Uncomfortable, Comrade?"  
"Don't try to seduce me Roza. It won't work. I have too much self-control. But by God I wish it _would_ work."  
I laughed, and he smiled,  
"You have a beautiful smile."  
I covered my lips, "Thank you."  
He reached forward and I took his hand so that he could lead me over to the bed.  
"Look at me." He said, softly, and I did.  
"I need you to trust me, Roza. Do you?"  
I nodded, not thinking twice, "Yes."  
He reached forward, towards my jeans and I tensed, but didn't push him away.  
"If at any time you want me to stop, I will." He said, as he undid the button, and pulled down the zipper,  
"Trust me. I won't hurt you."  
I nodded, and he pulled down my jeans, and helped me out of them so that I was standing before him, half naked.  
He pulled back the blankets,  
"In you go." He said, "Lye on your stomach." I did as he wanted without asking questions. He covered me up to my hips, and I heard the rustle of a bag,  
"Don't look." He said, and I nodded, where my head lay on the pillow. He set something on the bedside table behind me,  
"Roza, I'm going to unlatch this, but I won't be seeing your breasts, alright?" He asked, and I nodded again, blushing, as he undid the clasp on my bra and pulled it to the sides.  
I cringed as something wet and somewhat cold hit my back, then he began to rub it in, and knead his knuckles into my muscles.  
Oh God…he was massaging me. And he knew _exactly_ what he was doing.

Afterwards, I'd ended up falling asleep in one of his T-shirts in nothing other than my panties.  
I'd begged him to stay with me when it was over, and he held me in his arms as I fell asleep.  
I stayed up for an extra hour thinking about how much my life had changed in the last couple of weeks. How _Dimitri_ and I had changed, and how different our relationship was with each other. I fell asleep to thoughts of him, and I wouldn't have had it any other way.

I woke earlier than him though, but had slept amazingly, for the first time in a long while.  
I slowly disentangled myself from him and picked up my phone, walking to take a shower.  
When I got out, I saw that I had a message, I sighed, knowing it was probably Lissa, considering I hadn't talked to her last night.  
I opened it and put the phone to my ear,  
_Hello Rosie, _A familiar, grizzly voice said.  
I froze, and nearly dropped my phone,  
_It's me if you remember. I'm sure you do though. You're a pretty little thing. Not much different than how you were the last time we saw you. We saw what you did to our friend. Having his own grandmother shoot him, oh that's low. But, now we've taken something from you, trade-for-trade.  
_No, no, no…they couldn't have… tears filled my eyes as I heard a baby, _my_ baby, crying in the background.  
_It's hard to believe that one of us could be the father to this adorable little bundle. Anyways, although seeing your face right now, would be priceless, I know we have other things to discuss. I want you. __**We**__ want you, and we're prepared to make a trade. You can't bring any of your little friends you've been traveling with lately, though. I don't know who the hell they are, but this is how it will go. You will get away from them, and you will trade yourself over for the life of our son.  
_**My** son. I thought bitterly, He was **mine**. And there was no way in hell, that I wouldn't take the deal that they were offering, this was my _baby_ we were talking about. And God, I was happy that I now knew where Andrew was, but I would do anything in the world for it to not have been with the men who had him now. I was still in shock, I couldn't believe that they had found me. Not even a little bit, although I shouldn't have been surprised. They said the night they had raped me that they would come back for more. They'd said, that they were marking their territory when they peed on me, to defile me further after they'd beaten and raped me. And now they were back for more.  
_I will text you the address, and you will come. _  
He sounded so reassured, so sure of the fact that I would be there.  
And I knew…He was right. There was absolutely nothing I could do to prevent it.  
Because my baby boy mattered to me more than anything in the world.  
He mattered more than _me_, and my life.  
And because I loved him, I was going to take this deal.

**What do you think? Sorry, I know it's kind of short, and feel free to yell at me in your reviews, but I knew that I'd promised to write another chapter this weekend, and I felt guilty for not getting it done till last night, so I hoped you liked it! Rate and Review, if you'd like, I would greatly appreciate it(: **

**-RMNicki-  
~*~*~**


	10. Standing in the Middle of a Massacre

_~*~*~  
Review of Last Chapter: (Voicemail message)  
I want you. __We__ want you, and we're prepared to make a trade. You can't bring any of your little friends you've been traveling with lately, though. I don't know who the hell they are, but this is how it will go. You will get away from them, and you will trade yourself over for the life of our son.__  
_My son. I thought bitterly, He was mine. And there was no way in hell, that I wouldn't take the deal that they were offering, this was my _baby_ we were talking about. And God, I was happy that I now knew where Andrew was, but I would do anything in the world for it to not have been with the men who had him now. I was still in shock, I couldn't believe that they had found me. Not even a little bit, although I shouldn't have been surprised. They said the night they had raped me that they would come back for more. They'd said, that they were marking their territory when they peed on me, to defile me further after they'd beaten and raped me. And now they were back for more.  
_I will text you the address, and you will come. _  
He sounded so reassured, so sure of the fact that I would be there.  
And I knew…He was right. There was absolutely nothing I could do to prevent it.  
Because my baby boy mattered to me more than anything in the world.  
He mattered more than _me_, and my life.  
And because I loved him, I was going to take this deal.  
~*~*~

**Rose **

I looked down at my phone, praying that there would be a call back number, and to my surprise…there was. It shouldn't have surprised me as much as it did.  
_Narcissistic, cocky bastards.  
_I shakily got dressed in the bathroom and pulled my hair up into a messy bun, skipping make up, I walked out silently to see Dimitri still sleeping, in only sweatpants. I watched him for about five seconds before I reluctantly tore my gaze away from his half naked body. Tears filled my eyes and I turned back towards the door.  
_I could wake him…get his help. Figure this out.  
_No. I couldn't. They could hurt Andrew…I couldn't risk that, not ever.  
_They could hurt him anyways…  
_They'd be more likely to hurt him if I brought someone.  
_My God, I'm arguing with myself. _  
That annoying quote that I used to think about ran through my head,  
_You're not crazy if you talk to yourself. You're only crazy if you start replying.  
_I forced all thoughts out of my mind and reached for the locks and as quietly as I could undid them. I bit my lip as the dead lock made a clicking noise, then sagged slightly after it was over.  
I closed my eyes and pulled open the door, and yelped in shock when a hand shot out, catching it and forcing it shut. I stepped back in surprise and my back met a _very_ familiar body.  
"Where do you think you're going, Roza?" Dimitri asked, his voice low in warning, close to my ear.  
I scrambled for an excuse, and when I thought of nothing, I changed the subject,  
"I thought you were sleeping…"  
"That's not going to work Rose. Answer my question."  
Thinking back on it, I should have said something like 'I was going down to the breakfast buffet', but I'd been caught off guard and as if I didn't already have enough on my mind…  
I sucked in a sharp breath when his hand suddenly slipped into my back pocket. I arched forward towards the door, trying to escape him, but his free arm simply wrapped around my waist.  
"Dimitri, wait-" I begged as his fingers grasped my cell phone. He let me go and I spun towards him, my eyes wide.  
I hadn't deleted the damn message, how had he even known!?  
"There's nothing in there. I was just walking outside for a second." I lied, surprised by the smoothness in my voice, despite my pulsing anxiety.  
He looked up at me as if I'd just told him Aliens had landed outside the hotel,  
"Is that why you were struggling with me?"  
"Well, technically…I wasn't struggling."  
I lunged for my phone suddenly, and managed to snatch it out of his fingers…I thought frantically for a moment and made a rash decision, and shoved it down my shirt.  
He walked towards me and I backed up, there was no way I could fight him. I wouldn't anyways. I gasped as the back of my knees met the end of the bed we'd been sleeping in. He grabbed my shoulder and pushed, so that I fell backwards onto the bed. He caught my right wrist, and I fought to get him to release it, but his legs, straddled mine, disabling me from the waist down,  
"Let me up!" I protested, frantically,  
"No." He replied, grabbing my other wrist in my distraction, he pressed them beneath me and moved his legs closer so that I was pinned.  
I looked up at him desperately, and he met my eyes unflinchingly. I squirmed but to no avail as his right hand moved down the front of my shirt,  
"No, no, no!" I cried as he held me still until his fingers reached into the band of my bra.  
"Please Dimitri, don't do this!"  
"I'm sorry Roza." He said sincerely as he pulled my phone out and clicked it on. I fought his grip on me as he opened my voicemail.  
Tears filled my eyes as he pressed the speaker to his ear and listened. His eyes darkened and adesperate sob shook my body.  
He pulled the phone away and sat it beside me, and I stared up at him, my throat dry, feeling like I couldn't breathe.  
He took my hands from in between us and instead pinned them above my head,  
"You were going to run away and meet them." He stated, and I knew he was waiting for an answer.  
I nodded, "I don't have a choice! They said I couldn't bring you guys, and that if I did they would hurt him! I can't let that happen, I have to go alone!"  
"They would have killed you Rose!" He said, his voice scarily calm.  
"I know." I replied,  
He stood, and I sat up. He stared down at me, and I could see the anger and hurt in his eyes, and a pang of guilt struck me. I wasn't even going to leave him a note…  
I stood and walked into his arms, wrapping my arms around his waist, he was slow to react, and I was terrified that he'd given up. But, at the last second, his arms wrapped around me,  
"What in living hell were you thinking, Rose?" He asked, softly,  
"I'm sorry." I sobbed, "They have my baby. The men that nearly killed me, have my baby."  
"I know." He said, "And we're going to get him back. I promise."  
I looked up at him, "How?"  
"I'll wake the others, and we'll figure something out, but Rose I swear to God, if you try to run again, I'll make sure you don't sit comfortably for a week."  
I froze, then took a couple steps back, "Did you just…threaten to…" I struggled to even get the word out, "Did you just threaten to…_spank_ me?"  
He simply stared down at me, and my eyes widened, "You aren't serious…"  
"I am." He replied.  
"No you aren't…Have you forgotten that I'm a 'big girl'?" I asked in disbelief.  
"Do you want to test the theory?" He asked, taking a step closer, "Considering your stunt this morning, I'll be happy to give you a demonstration."  
"No!" I gasped, I'd expected him to back down, "I won't run. I promise."  
He nodded, and slipped my phone into his bag, I frowned but didn't say anything. I still couldn't believe… There was no way he could be serious, no way I would _let_ him…  
Could I stop him though, if he _was_ serious?

I shook the thought away as he got dressed, then took my wrist in his hand.  
"Do you have to hang on to me, like this?" I asked indignantly.  
He didn't reply, simply keeping hold of me. I sighed, feeling like a naughty child as he led me out of the room and into the hallway. The door to Alberta's room opened before we even made it, and she looked down at where Dimitri had a grip on my wrist.  
"What happened?"  
He handed my phone over that I hadn't even seen him get.  
"They sent her a voice mail. She was going to run."  
Alberta nodded, and I stood there embarrassed as she listened to the threats.

It was only an hour later that I received the address, that the…scum had promised to text me.  
"That's the old abandoned Train station." I said, as Dimitri read the address to me through the blue tooth in my ear. I was connected to all of the others through the line, and was only able to focus on them when they were talking to me directly. They'd rented a rental car so that the men I was going to meet wouldn't recognize the cars they'd seen us in the other day.  
"Do trains still run through there, Rose?" Stan asked,  
"Yeah the trains still use the tracks, they just don't stop there anymore."  
"I don't like it." Dimitri breathed, "Stay away from the tracks, Rose. Don't let them corner you."  
"Yep." I said, maybe a little too quickly.  
Dimitri cut the others off the connection for a moment so that it was just him and me,  
"Are you alright?"  
"Nope." I replied, and heard him sigh,  
"Just keep in mind Rose, that you aren't alone. We're here. But don't do anything outside of the plan, do you understand?"  
"What if-"  
"_Please_ Rose." He said and my eyes widened at his pleading tone,  
"O-okay."  
"Put the ear bud in now, it's a one way thing. You won't be able to speak to us. But, it's clear and less noticeable. We'll be able to hear you and what's happening on your end, okay?"  
"Okay." I breathed, pulling out the small case he'd given me, and slipping it into my ear.  
"Alright. Put the blue tooth on the other ear so that when they tell you to take it off, they'll think that they're in control." I nodded to myself more than anyone else, knowing that they wouldn't be able to hear me until I had it on again.  
"I'm almost there."  
"We know. We're ready. They won't be able to see us. But if anything goes wrong, we'll be there in about 30 seconds."  
"Okay." I breathed, biting my lip.  
"Listen to me when I say this… There's a code word in the Academy. If you need us, say _Buria_. They don't have to hear it. Even if you just whisper it, we'll hear you."  
"Got it."  
"Alright. Stay safe, Roza. I believe in you."  
I took a deep shaky breath. He believed in me.  
I pulled up to the station, and closed my eyes for a moment,  
_Suck it up Rose.  
_I opened the door and got out, walking over to the deserted ticket area.  
I remembered the story and the reason why people didn't come down here anymore. About a year ago there had been a man who'd gotten off the train and once he'd been on the landing, he'd pulled a gun out and let bullets loose on any one within a twenty foot radius.  
There had been 4 deaths and 6 injured. 2 had been children.  
I was standing in the middle of a former massacre.  
And if you looked hard enough you could still see the blood stains around, and chills ran up my spine seeing as they were more clear to my stronger eye sight.  
I closed my eyes, to focus.  
I thought of Andrew, and kept my gaze trained on the ground below me, I needed to be fully here in order to get through this. And I had every intention of doing just that.  
It was all up to fate, now.

~*~*~  
**Cliffie (; Please don't hate me.  
What did you think?  
I just wanted to thank all of you. I know some of you don't review, and I really don't give a damn as long as you read and enjoy!  
Hope you liked this chapter, it was fun to come up with, and I enjoyed writing it.  
Thank you for being my inspiration, guys!  
~*~*~**


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